JAMES MORSE

I’m writing this post from a really depressed place, but the thing is, I can’t really identify anything in particular that may have led me here. It must be a chemical experience because there’s this vague sense that everything and everyone is somehow against me, but there’s not any particular reason for it. I’ve known this depression so many times in my life, and the only answer is to keep going. It’s like running a marathon. Just one mile at a time.

It’s hard to stay motivated at work during moments like this. What can I do to find meaning in this moment? If I’m really searching for fulfillment, I need to believe that it really is in the present, but maybe just hard to see in the midst of the fog. What fears are leading me to this sense of existential dread?

I didn’t sleep well at all last night. I haven’t had too much trouble lately so this was a little unexpected. I’m trying to see my mood as a result primarily of chemical and physical factors, but it is difficult. My mind wants to find some mental deficiency that it can fix, but maybe it’s more simple than that.